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Plumbing with the Starlets

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Fucking with the Stars" fares less well as a send-up of the similarly-named TV demonstrate than as an chance for Coco LaChine and Chi Chi LaRue to do their comic turns. LaChine and crew go for absolute bankrupt and end up being as much a part of the joy as the actual fucking. As far as prizes go, a chunky, platinum spray-painted dildo that's studded with gewgaws may not be worth coveting. But the notoriety that comes along with being crowned starlet banger is another matter. Four pornography starlets are paired with a counterpart. Here is where the "Dancing with the Stars" tie-in doesn't fairly work. It's never clear just who is supposed to be the seasoned "dancer" and who is the celeb brought in for ratings. In the end, does it indeed matter? The introductory antics in pornography comedies, here hosted by the uber-cute LaChine, is something I usually get rapidly bored with. Not here. The three judges: director Chi Chi LaRue, gossip columnist Billy Masters, and jack-of-all-trades Bruce Vilanch, seemed to completely go along with the conceit of an on-air talent competition, and tho the jabs and jibes were all too scripted, their execution of the scripted remarks went over well. The first of the contestants is the darling Kevin Brown, a lad whose aw-shucks cuteness seems fully too veritable to be a put-on. And like the other hopefuls who follow, Kevin does a provocative strip-tease for the judges before the real performance gets underway. After wiggling his money-maker in their faces (nearly putting Vilanch into coronary arrest) Kevin makes his way to a purrfectly concentric bed onstage. Putting me in mind of a circus ring, it seemed the flawless place to be if you're gonna be scored on how well you perform in the sack. And was there ever a more cunning show than Kevin ass-up on a circular bed? He's joined by his partner, Zackary Pierce, who handles our guy to a tender rubdown before rolling him over and latching onto his prick. Kevin loses several points for eye contact (at times he transports himself right out of the vignette by keeping his eyes clipped shut or tossing a arm over his brow) but compensates with a super-hot 69. And this pup never loses his spunk-pump when Zackary bangs him on his back, gloriously demonstrating his one-of-a-kind sunburst tattoo. Moments after Kevin blows his load, he emerges before the judge's panel in a simple milky terrycloth robe, the sound of canned applause sparkling underneath, an supreme chance for Bruce Vilanch to get off several witty zingers. The groundwork is laid for several running gags, the evaluation of each successive models' performance is always the same dizzy-headed repeat of several meaningless phrases and the judges always give the exact same scores.
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Added: 2017-12-01 • Views: 12 • Duration: 1:53:16
Categories: Anal, Full Movie, Cumshot, Hunks, Kissing, Massage, Rimming, Rough, Studs, Tattoos, Toys, Twinks • Models: Arpad Miklos, Zackary Pierce, Luca DiCorso, Derrick Hanson, Manuel Torres, Derrick Vinyard, Jamie Donovan, Kevin Brown, Billy Masters, Bruce Vilanch, Chi Chi LaRue
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